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The One Thing That Kills An Online Business
Hey, this is Richard Chancy from RichardChancy.com, and I want to talk to you today about the one thing that will absolutely kill your business. No, it's not your spouse. It's not your parents. It's not your boss. It's not your intelligence. It's none of that stuff. What it is is your core beliefs.
My pastor is Andy Stanley at North Point Church here in Atlanta, and one of the things he said in his book, The Principle of the Path, is, “It's not your intention, but your direction that determines your destination.” Not your intention, but your direction that determines your destination. In redneck terms, that means it ain't what you ought to do that's going to get you where you're going. It's actually where you're heading that's going to get you where you're going even if where you're heading is just sitting on the couch every night and watching television. Really, your actions are critical to helping you move forward, but there's a whole lot more to it than just your actions.
Where do those actions come from? They're actually being driven by your core beliefs. Your core beliefs are the things that you believe in your gut. Most of us are walking around, and we really don't know what our core beliefs are. As a side note, if you're going to be in business, it's really important that you can develop a mentality for your ideal customer so that you know not just what the features and benefits of your product or your service is, but where you understand your potential clients so well that you understand not just what keeps them up at night, but what their core beliefs are.
Part of that process starts with understanding what your own core beliefs are. A lot of these core beliefs come from the age of 10 or below, so you develop a lot of your core beliefs or your ideas about who you are and the way you move through the world before you're 10 years old. A lot of that comes from your parents. A lot of it comes from other influences, teachers, and those kind of things reinforcing the ideas and the beliefs about who you are. Some of these ideas are empowering thoughts. They're very powerful things. They're things that make us get up and do the things that we feel like we were created to do.
A lot of these things are also limiting beliefs. Let me give you an idea about that. Actually, as I was preparing for this training today … I go to lunch at my gym every day, so I go and work out and I do group fitness and I have a trainer that does fitness there, and she also watches all my food on MyFitnessPal because I'm trying to lose those extra 10 pounds I've been trying to lose forever. I get in there today, and we start working out. She comes over to me and she says, “Hey, what do you think is holding you back?” I've lost about 15 pounds, and I need about 10 more to go. She said, “What do you think is holding you back?” I said, “Man, that's crazy. I'm actually doing a training on this idea this afternoon, this limiting belief idea.”
As I continued to do the circuit training, I started thinking, “Hey, what really is holding me back in this area?” Here's what it is. It's Little Dickie in the husky jeans. If my mom is reading this, she's laughing right now because I grew up with the name, Dickie. I was named after a friend of my parents who died in Vietnam, and his name was Richard William, which is my name. He went by Dick, so I went by Dick, translated to all of my family called me Little Dickie growing up, which is funny because I'm a 220-pound man now, but Little Dickie still lives inside. The husky jeans, I can remember going and buying pants at a store and remember the husky section. You're probably laughing if you've never visited the husky section of the aisle. They don't call it that anymore, but for those of us that feel that pain, it's a very, very visceral thought process and emotion, this husky jeans idea.
When she's asking me this question about what's holding me back, you know what it is? It's Little Dickie in the husky jeans. As long as I've been an adult, I didn't realize that. Actually working on this training today, I learned something by getting ready to teach you something. That belief holds me back. How does that work exactly? It works in a couple of ways. Let me just talk to you for a second about a book I read years ago called Leadership and Self Deception, a great book. There's a link to it in the description below. You should absolutely check it out. Not only is it one of the best leadership books I've ever read, and I apologize to John Maxwell, my former employer, in saying that, but not only is it one of the best leadership books I've ever read, it's also one of the best books on marriage and just being a human being.
You Have to Get Out of the Box
Here's why, because it talks about this concept of when you do something that's not in line with what your core beliefs are, then you … The concept, they called it at that point, was you go into the box. When you act in a way that's not in accordance with what you believe, you go into the box. In the box, all you want to do is be justified. Let me give you an example of that. A man's laying in bed with his wife, and the baby starts to cry. He can do one of two things. He can get up and go take care of the baby, which is the right thing to do. He knows it's the right thing to do, but if he chooses not to do that, not to take that action, then what happens is he lays in the bed and he starts to justify. Doesn't she know how hard I work? Doesn't she know I have a meeting tomorrow? Can she possibly imagine all of the things that I've got going on?
Do you understand what I'm talking about here? If you think about this for a second, you'll realize how many times a day you're doing this and I'm doing this. When we act in a way that's not in accordance with what we believe, we go into the box. What the book doesn't talk about is when those core beliefs are limiting beliefs. If I had the limiting belief that I'm Little Dickie that wears husky jeans, even as a 40+ year-old man, I'm still carrying Little Dickie in the husky jeans with me into every conversation I have about my diet and my exercise and my fitness, and it doesn't matter what I look like. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what goals I reach, I'm always going to feel like I'm never there because of Little Dickie and the husky jeans. I hope that's making sense to you.
You Have to Shift Your Core Beliefs
These core beliefs are critical, and you need to be able to shift these core beliefs to be able to move forward. If you're getting ready to start your business or you're getting ready to scale your business and your core belief is that you don't have it in you, you have already failed. I can't even explain this well enough. The fact of the matter is is if you've got a limiting belief and you're trying to act against that out here, you're going to fail. Here's what I did. I actually did a limiting beliefs exercise on RichardChancy.com, and all you've got to do is click the link below, RichardChancy.com/start. I did a two-part video series on limiting beliefs, really understanding how to get it in the core of them and then what to do about them, and I think you'll find a lot of value in that. Click the button at the bottom of the page and go sign up for that.
The way we're setting up our website is we've got a ton of free content that we're putting on there, and when you register for our site, our free membership site, you'll get access to all of that stuff, as well as anything we put up in the future.
Your Subconscious Mind
I'm going to keep moving. You've got your actions. You've got your beliefs. Then you've got your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind is doing one thing. It's trying to protect you, and that's all it's trying to do. It's translating information from the outside world, and it's taking that information and it's filing it away into your subconscious mind, into your belief system, and it's putting information in there that's going to protect you from physical pain, from emotional pain, and even from fear, even if the fear is not real. It will convince you to do nothing in order to protect you. That's incredibly important.
Where does the subconscious mind develop these ideas? It actually comes from the conscious mind. What do I mean by that? I don't want to get all ethereal on you and all this kind of stuff. Got a degree in psychology. Didn't learn this there. I basically learned two things, and it was absolutely worth it for the two things that I learned. We'll talk about that in a later blog, but the bottom line is this. Your subconscious mind is constantly taking in information. In fact, I read an article years ago that said, “On average, in America, we are advertised 3,000 times a day.” That means that somebody is putting a message into our conscious mind 3,000 a day.
Your parents are feeding into this or they did when you were younger and they may still be. Television's feeding into this. Your boss is feeding into this. Your spouse is feeding into this. Your friends are feeding into this. They're all giving you a message. There's constant messages in here. What's happening is these messages are coming in through your conscious mind, and they're being filtered by your subconscious mind and they're backing up your belief system. If you've got a limiting belief system down here, every day, 1,000 times a day, 2,000 times a day, the information is coming in, and it's backing up those limiting beliefs, and that's why you need to get over to my site and try that limiting beliefs exercise.
So What Do I Do About It?
Let me stay with this for a second. What do you do about this? How do you defeat it? We're going to talk about the limiting beliefs exercise on the other site, but let me tell you this. This is how I do it. Books. You've heard this 1,000 times that in five years your life will look like the people that you surround yourself with and the books that you read. On a side note, what nobody tells you about that is when you surround yourself with the people you want to be like, you're always low man on the totem pole and it's a humbling experience. I've done it. The circle of people, the five people that I hang out with most, they all are way more successful in the business world than I am, and I love it. Many of them are much younger than I am, too.
Also a point to note, if you're going to be in this world of taking your business online or building an online business, just know this. The older you get, the younger your mentors are going to get because the people that really have this figured out, they're younger than me. There's a few of them that are older, but most of them are younger.
Load Up On Information
We've got to put books, we've got to put podcasts, we've got to put audio books. We've got to constantly be putting the information in to combat all this negative stuff. The good news is we can be a lot more focused with the stuff that we're putting in than these people are because they don't know us that well. Then we can start to take the information that we're getting from our parents and our spouse and our boss and our friends and we can put that through a different filter and build a different belief system, and we can let these people who love us, who are trying to protect us, we can let them fuel the fire of an empowering belief versus a limiting belief because these people don't want to hurt you. They don't have ill will towards you. They just want to protect you. They're trying to do the same thing your subconscious mind is. They don't want to see you fail, and they don't realize that failing to fail is failure, and that's it.
Go ahead now and get over to the site and check out that limiting beliefs exercise, and get out there and start something! I'll see you in the next training.
Click the link below and start the process with me for changing those beliefs.
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